"We surrender the person known only in the dreams of God to become a persona shaped by the whims of others...The woman lost in vain conceit spends more time on the cosmetic and neglects the spirit" Erwin McManus pg 29 "Uprising"
This morning I was reading "Uprising" by Erwin McManus and came across the above statement and thought I would share my thoughts. I couldn't help but be convicted and know that many times I am this woman. The world has defined beauty as perfection. Perfection in physical appearance. You must not be too skinny, but you shouldn't be too fat either...perfection is best. In my mind, only skinny, pretty girls get married. Men are visual creatures and they see air brushed perfection crammed in their faces thousands of times of day from TV, Internet, ads, or highway signs whether they want it or not. Perfection is expected. The world expects physical perfection and physical perfection defines beauty.
Beauty has to be something so much deeper than this. Perfection is an illusion and misleading. Perfect girls don't really exist. But why is that the world demands it and I am constantly struggling to be defined by the worlds standard rather than Jesus' standard? Bulimia and anorexia is becoming common place and wanting to be sexy is being desired and sought after by young teens more than success, godliness, or education.
I would be lying if I said I never fall into this trap. In fact, many times daily I have to remind myself that I am not defined by the world's standards. I think in some ways this semester, I have failed. Alicia is a "woman lost in vain conceit spending more time on the cosmetic and neglecting the spirit."
This past semester, I have lost 20 lbs. I have worked very hard and very diligently and been disciplined to lose weight. My focus and attention and goals have been focused towards losing so that I can be attractive by the world's standards. I mean, yes I did it to be healthy also, but if I was completely honest, I was more motivated by wanting to be attractive by the world's standards. But I have spent more discipline, time, and energy this semester working on my physical appearance than working on my spiritual appearance. It has honestly been a pretty dry semester spiritually with lack of desire for His word.
I am not saying, that as females we should let ourselves go physically but rather our size or pounds on the scale can't define us and give us our value. My true value is understood in the presence of Jesus and living a FULL, RADICAL and SPENT life for Him. If this comes first, then putting energy and time into losing 20lbs is healthy and encouraged. Then I am doing it out of my love for Jesus and my desire to take care of the body He has given me. However, I am still easily enticed by the world's standards. Daily, I must remind myself that beauty is so much deeper than big boobs, small waistlines, and cute clothes. I think this is something that I will struggle with my whole life, but I am thankful that Jesus sees my beauty and defines my value. I also have to remind myself that one day, the man God has for me, will also see my beauty and my value...even if I do have a little extra junk in my trunk!!
Being a female is rough these days... wouldn't you agree? My prayer is that I would be the woman that God dreams for me to be and that I would seek his approval more than I seek to waste my life being attractive by the worlds standards. How many people around you have you seen that struggle with the latter? Let us be true woman that are seeking the heart of God and then we achieve beauty that never fades and that won't one day need plastic surgery!
How many of you out there would say that you struggle with being defined by the world's standard? Let's work hard to redefine beauty among the women in our own community by living full, radical, spent lives for Jesus and His purposes rather than using our lives to please the world!
8 comments:
great post, alicia...i can tell it came straight from the heart. you're absolutely right. we do spend more time trying to be perfect on the outside than on the inside. and, yes, there's a lot of pressure, but we still have the truth to hold on to. i'm proud of the hard work and motivation you had this year, and i know that God will help you (help us both) exercise that determination for more worthy causes. until then...don't read beauty magazines. they will only make you feel ugly.
Great writing...
So so true. I raise both hands in response to the question because there are periods in my life where I am obsessive about my appearance, and even get depressed over it. I am also proud of you for the hard work you put in this year so far to be healthy. That is important. I also think it's great that you realize a change is needed in your focus...I wish I didn't have that struggle too! You are truly beautiful, Alicia!
It IS hard being a woman these days! We are expecting to be sexy and alluring, yet virginal. We are expected to be rail thin with big breasts and a curvy behind. And that body type is largely artificial. A freak of nature. Lord, help us!
I know it took a lot of work to lose 20 pounds last semester. I have lost some weight myself and found in the process that my fascination with food has been lessened and the guilt of knowing I was out of shape is also gone. So those are good things. But it is so, so easy to slip onto the other side of the fence. The enemy loves to tip us off balance.
I know that God is powerful enough to give us balance in this area. We can be physically and spiritually strong at the same time. But I know that if I was trying to be a size 4 I wouldn't be able to maintain that balance. I think the line is different for each person. There's actually a really good web site at www.findingbalance.com. It speaks to people who do not officially have eating disorders, but whose lives are affected by getting off balance in the area of eating, dieting, or working out. I heard the lady, Constance Rhodes, speak a few years ago and it was awesome!
Love you, sister!
Amanda
Amanda,
I couldn't agree with you more. Size 4 is impossible for me and my body type. And I have devoted this year to healthy living which has been great and to finding where my body is happy! I just think that its amazing how disciplined I can become in my eating regiment but my lack of discipline when it comes to spiritual matters!! Life is always about balance!!
I think too...when you diet...you realize food is just food and its just another area of balance in your life. But if its the ONLY thing you are concentrating on balancing...that is the problem.
Lord, Help us find balance in all areas!!
Thanks for sharing your heart. It blessed and encouraged me. You are beautiful but I will be praying for you (and myself) that God would enhance His true, lasting beauty in us.
This is so beautifully put!! I needed to hear this this morning. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. I definitely find myself as well getting consumed with the way I look and if I'm wearing as cute of clothes as the friend next to me. I really struggle with this on Sunday mornings, which is the last thing we should be consumed with when we come to worship our Lord. Thanks for the reminder. Every women needs to read this post.
i think we tend to ignore out own feelings of envy, jealousy and pride to name a few when we complain about the "world's standard" Some people are truly beautiful physically and some are beautiful physically mentally and spiritually....whenever we buy into it (see melissa's post re: Nicole Simpson at the lpm blog) we promote it... we all need to buy into, reward, and talk about the kind of beauty that goes to India to work with brothers and sisters...
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