Islam and the Death of OBL #EverdayMay

Today I have been processing the death of Osama Bin Ladin and what the implications of his death are and what exactly my emotional or intellectual response should be. As I was watching images of Pakistan on news stations, it made my heart long for the places in the Middle East and South Asia that I have had the privilege of traveling to. But most importantly, I thought about the people I met and the impact that 9/11 has had on their own lives regarding their religious identity. The events 9/11 not only had traumatic implications on the lives of Americans but also on the lives of Muslims worldwide and the world’s perception of what it means to be Muslim or to be a part of the Islamic faith.

This past summer, I got the opportunity to travel to the Middle East, specifically the country of Oman. My purpose to be in Oman was to collect ethnographic research of a specific people group, the Bedouin. Over these 5 weeks, I had the honor of interviewing and understanding who the Omani people are and learning more about their religion, and to them what it means to be Muslim.

Several times in our interviews, the Omani people would bring up 9/11 with the intent to separate themselves from OBL and his organization. There was a specific doctor that I had the opportunity to interview that actually told the story of where she was at the time of 9/11 and how it personally affected her. Below is her story. *The grammar is a little rough because this was just the transcription of our interview with her.

“The day I left of Oman it was the events of September 11. From Oman I went to Cardif, to stud for school. [After arriving in Cardif], One Omani guy was also at my hotel, and he told me he was going out to buy something [and asked me] do you want to go out with me, and I said yes because I need to buy a phone card to tell my family that I have arrived. This Omani guy had a large beard, [and the store] was like 10 km of walking. I went to one shopping mall and there was a live showing of the second plane hitting the towers. It was silent and no sound and everyone was shocked and watching. I was thinking it was a movie. I didn't realize it was real. The guy I was with went to the upper floor to buy a video camera, he told me to come. And everyone was looking at me because I was wearing the scarf and everybody was looking at me and panicking. And we didn't know that something was happening. So we went back to the hostel and it was raining so he put the camera inside his jacket and closed it and it looked like he was carrying something. [Because he had a long beard and was carrying something in his jacket] everyone was thinking he was a terrorist. People are walking and looking at us on the street. I am very sad and I wonder what they think of us. We got on a bus. The minutes we got on the bus everyone got off the bus. Why have people done this? He said it is because we different with beard and wearing scarf. And I said no something is very different today. Everyone got off the bus and the driver was looking at us and we were just sitting. We went back to the hostel. The next day early, I saw the newspaper, because we didn't have the TV, and then we knew what happened.”

This was just one story of many Muslims that we interviewed whose lives were interrupted based the appearance of a beard and a scarf. There were multiple times during interviews that our Muslims interviewees would bring up 9/11 to apologize. They were just as horrified at the events that took place. Many even said if they saw OBL they would kill him themselves.

The events of 9/11 and the past decade have given Muslims and Islam a misleading religious identity. It is sad that most people equate Islam with terrorism. So today, as I think of Osama’s death, I wonder how it will affect the Muslim community around the world. I am sure they are rejoicing because a deceptive and powerful leader that has spread mistruths about Islam has been finally given “justice”.

I write all this because I struggle with the stewardship of the stories and lives of the people I have met over a span of 16 countries. I don’t really have any great spiritual or intellectual insight beyond these words, but the stories of Muslims and their accounts of 9/11 haunt me. But I want to tell the story of Muslims who might not have a voice. I hope that if anything, this post reminds us that more people than the US suffered at the evil hand of OBL and his organization. Countless individuals in the Islamic community worldwide suffer with being misunderstood and affiliated with terrorism and murder.

May is Finally Here! #everdaymay

May is finally here! I have been anticipating this joyous month since the fall of 2008 when I started my graduate career. These next few weeks, I am wrapping up last assignments and ultimately my graduate career. My life will soon be about whatever I want, in the sense that professors and syllabi will not be the things that inform me of what to read and write. There will be new freedom to explore, to engage, and to participate in new opportunities. This season, that I have been telling myself is “just a season,” is actually coming to an end! The time is here!

But with this, comes the reality that my time in California is also coming to an end. I will be heading to Texas to pursue full-time ministry with a new church plant. I always knew that California would just be a season. There is nothing keeping me here anymore. The things (job, school, and church) that God specifically brought me to California for have ended. But ultimately they were the exact things that God used to prepare me and equip me to go. So as I walk into the month of May, I bring a lot of emotions to the table. This month will be a month of not only celebrating great accomplishments, but also a month of acknowledging the closure of a great season.

So here’s to May and all the joys and emotions it brings! Also, I have committed to blog every day in May with some friends in my Sandals Church community. It was cleverly coined #everydaymay. So look forward to my rough thoughts and edits of the things God is doing in my heart and my life daily this month.

Capstone Papers

Next Friday, my graduate cohort of 11, will be presenting our final capstone papers. If you happen to be in the Bay Area on May 7, then feel free to come by and participate in our presentations.

After 2 years, I am proud of us and proud of what we have accomplished together. Below are the papers each member will be presenting. It might give you a small glimpse into what a Masters of Intercultural Studies actually is.

Addressing Global Shifts

Danielle Pester

Globalization of Voluntary Action: The Rise of the Non-State Actor

Jill Sornson

Establishing Principles for Integrative Design: Opportunities for Public-Interest Architecture

Deanne Carter

The Complexities of Visual Research in a Digital Age

- - - - - - - - - -

Institutional Influences on Society

Abbey Jones

Politics and Religion: Reexamining "Biblical" Approaches to Government

Rebekah Woodring

Driven by Islam: Government Control of Education and the Effects on Family

Greg Dickson

An Emerging Superpower: Changes from Within

Lindsay Bunker

"Have fewer children, live better lives" : The New Ideal Chinese Family

- - - -

The Church Engaging Culture

Alicia Divers

Organizational Culture of the Missional Church

Colby Brewer

"True religion is this..." : Addressing Ethical Barriers to Inter-country Adoption

Carmel Hall

Face to Face with Reality: The Evangelical Church's Response to the HIV AIDS Community

Trent Wilkins

Eclipsing the Cross: Individual and Social Dimensions of Muslim Background Believers

God's Provision and Good Friday

God's PROVISION has been a consistent theme in my life over the last nine months. As most of you know, I lost my job in August which kind of threw me into a financial downward spiral and also into a bit of a loss of identity in ministry and God's plan.

God's first initial provision came in the form of unemployment insurance. Since August, His provision has come in little packages such as random large checks, checks coming that were some how more than they have should been, friends that let me borrow, etc...you name it and God did it on my behalf. Despite the fact that I make less than I actually owe in bills, I have always been able to pay my bills and live. Get this: somewhere in the midst of working 2 jobs that makes less than what I collect on unemployment, God has provided for me to pay off all my credit card debt and have money in my savings. What?! I know. God crazy provides. On top of all of this, I have a place to live in Houston that is practically free. Movement. People have always told me that when you have to trust God for finances it just works, that it doesn't make sense, but somehow He just provides. I never understood people that said this, now I do. The best part of His provision is that He does it in such a way that I can't help but acknowledge His hand in providing.

The fun part about God's provision is that it's not always monetary. In January, he provided me with this new direction to become church staff. His provision has come in the form of a new ministry and a new identity that I would not have been able to have unless the other was taken away. His provision has also been an evident sign of His movement in my life. Its the wind beneath my sail that I need to trust for the unknown.

In God's provision, I have wondered, "Why do I deserve this?". I mean I have been struggling to tithe, I haven't been fully trusting when I should, and I have been struggling to have the "perfect" walk with God. The spiritual giant in me was slain awhile ago. Why do I deserve this? I haven't always been a good steward of the little things. Why provide?

Then tonight in small group we were talking about what Christ accomplished on the cross and how that translates to us as a gift. The problem is that many days, I operate off the wrong kind of gospel. I think that my own self-righteousness grants me favor with God. That when I do this spiritually awesome thing that God can then somehow bless me in ways that blow my mind. Most days I feel like I need to purchase my salvation instead of basking in the reality that Christ already purchased my salvation and my good standing before Christ.

All this to say, I was released from the lie that God's provision for me is based on my own merit or my own self-righteousness, but rather out of his love and grace for me despite sin or poor stewardship. Grace is just one of those mysterious things that we can hope to grasp, but mostly seek after because of the beauty of the chase.

So tonight, as I write this, I am basking in the gift of the gospel in my life and what his death accomplished on my behalf.

PS. I don't say all of this to say how awesome God is blessing me, but rather to gush His praises and His ability to give good gifts to His children. I just couldn't keep silent any longer cause His provision has been tripping me up. To Him be the Glory.

California Bucket List

So I only have a couple of months before I sadly peace out of Southern California. So I am in the process of making a California Bucket List to fulfill in the next couple of months....

Here it's what's on it:

1. Wine tasting in Santa Barbara

2. Joshua Tree

3. Meet/See a famous person

4. Yosemite

5. Redwoods

6. Walk the Golden Gate Bridge

7. Alcatrez

What else needs to be on my list and who wants to do these things with me?

I'm Moving to Texas!

"God has a global purpose for every detour in life."

In the summer of 2007, through consecutive events and multiple open doors, God made it glaringly clear that Riverside, California would be my new home and place of ministry after my 2 year stint in India. My transition to California living was easy and effortless thanks to knowing friends that were networked in all the right places. God birthed a couple of new passions and honed in on some skills during my time here in the last 3.5 years. These were a passion for college students and a passion for mobilizing others to gaining a heart for the lost across the globe. God used this time to grow me professionally with some awesome colleagues and mentors and to help contribute and understand the missions conversation in a university setting. My time in California has been a blessed blessed season and a season of reaping the joy of operating in ministry that is within my giftings. I have seriously LOVED every minute of it.

When my job ended at California in August, I was devastated and lost. I had moved to California to work at CBU and now that my ministry and reason for being in California was over, I began to pursue what God had for me next. I experienced about 5 months of silence and questions. The weight of choosing my next path was hanging over my head and quite honestly paralyzing me and stressing me out. I found great peace in the above quote, "God has a global purpose for every detour in life." I was actually just hoping that God did indeed have a plan, and he did!

In January, I received an email from my old college pastor Curtis Jones asking me to call him that day and that he had a few things to run by me. After hanging up with him on the phone, I was left with the a new decision to make. Him and his wife, Amanda, have decided to plant a church in Houston, Texas and they have asked me to come be a part of their team as their missions person. After a lot of prayer and consulting with people that love me here in my community, I have decided to accept the position!

What?

This means that I am officially moving to Houston, Texas to plant Bayou City Fellowship!! I think that my mother is most happy with my decision. I have not lived in Texas since 2005. I will be working bi-vocationally until the church is big enough then hopefully I will be able to come on as full-time staff. So it looks like I might have a future of Starbucks in Texas also, for a short time.

When?

I will be completing my first masters degree (Masters of Intercultural Studies) on May 19. So I plan to finish my degree and then enjoy my last summer in beautiful Southern California. I will make the road trip with my roomie Becka towards the end of July. Our church, Bayou City Fellowship, will debut to the public in the fall. I plan to transfer to Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary and finish my Masters of Theological Studies at their Houston campus.

Who?

Most people think that I have gone off the deep-end by leaving California to start a church-plant, especially because there are some crazy people out there. I was talking to a friend here in So Cal about how Curtis and Amanda was my old college pastor and she replied with, "Oh, so they're family." Yes. Curtis and Amanda are family. When I left for India, Curtis and Amanda looked me in the eyes and said, "we love you, we support you, and we always want you to be in the circle of people we know and love." And they have been faithful to a fault to their word through my journeys in India and California. They have been my biggest encouragers, supporters, and fans since I met them. They truly are family! I would be honored to be pastored under Curtis, but to be on the same team as him is an opportunity I was unwilling to pass up. Not to mention, Beth Moore will also be planting with us, in case you needed some credentials.

My Thoughts

I am super excited about what's next. However, I have no idea how to think or begin to say goodbye to California and all the people that have made my time here so awesome. It's always challenging to leave one really awesome season of life to pursue the unknown. I can't seem to conceptualize yet that pursuing one means I am abandoning the other. So I am going to try to live in my ignorance for as long as possible.

***I have a goal to find at least one Californian to take with me. Who is game?

Beauty of the Church Defined

I have been falling more and more in love with the church these days. She has always been a beautiful mystery to me, but enough of a mystery for me to keep my distance. Recently, I have had the opportunity to take a closer look at her and I am slowly falling in love.

Here is one beautiful definition:

"The church is a called out assembly whose public life is a sign, witness, foretaste, and instrument to which God is inviting all creation in Jesus Christ."

The Land of Inbetween

My good friend Amanda sent me this link where this jewel of wisdom was found.

*****************************************************************************************************************

There's a place between here and there. A piece of ground in the middle of take-off and landing. A section of the unknown within beginning and ending. You probably find yourself there from time to time. It's the land known as Inbetween.

Inbetween is one of the most rugged places in life. You aren't fully here, and you aren't fully there. Your emotions and hopes are strewn across an endless list of possibilities. Door knobs of wood, brass, and silver line the path, but which will open? In the land of Inbetween, the paths are lined with sealed envelopes and foggy dreams. Excitement runs forward and fears hold back. And if you stay long enough, you feel the tremors of your soul.

The land of Inbetween is downright scary. It's a place of blind trust. It's where the pedals of faith meet the narrow road of fortitude and where movement is demanded though there's no place to go. The worst part of this land isn't the uncertainty or frustration that accompany it - it's that God likes it when you're there.

While He's no sadist, God loves the land of Inbetween. He loves what it does to us. He loves the humility and dependence it creates in our hearts, so He creates innumerable forks in life's road that swerve us into the land of Inbetween. The unknowns of job, marriage, children, and home are the signs of this uncertain land. At times, people are thrust into Inbetween by mishaps, accidents, sudden deaths, and even unexpected fortune. Some people visit so many times they begin to wonder if it's life. And they aren't far off.

So what will hold you steady when you walk through the terrain of Inbetween? A recognition that Inbetween is God's design. In one miraculous moment, the Creator of the universe placed you in the greatest Inbetween of all time - the place between the earthly creation and eternity. Life's smaller lunges forward and backward are merely postcard reminders that there's something greater than this place we're visiting.

If you're in your own land of Inbetween, remember that God was the original designer of this journey. You can get mad, scream, and even pout if you want. But it doesn't change the fact that you're merely passing through. Everything else is Inbetween. (from Deeper Walk, a Relevant Devotional Series)

*****************************************************************************************************************

I too am in the Land of Inbetween these days. I find myself here more often then I like, but I am always thankful for what joy the previous land has brought me and the hope of what the next land will bring. What I do know is the God of the Land of Inbetween is sufficient and enough.

So for weeks like this week when the Land of Inbetween alsmost took me down, I depend and I trust fully and totally on the God who became the Land of Inbetween for me!

Middle Girls are Squirley

I survived my first week of teaching Middle School girls this week. I was able to meet about 40 new divas and was even more thankful that I NEVER have to return to those awkward two years of life. I of course pulled out my trendiest outfits in my closet to "impress", "woo", or "coerce" them into thinking that I was cool enough for them to listen to me and attend my class for the next semester.

These are some of my observation my time with Middle Schoolers this week...

1. Some are so very sweet and innocent....some are NOT.

2. Since when did Middle School girls cuss like sailors?

3. They think that people like Katie Perry has hung the moon. (great role model, eh) and their favorite songs are Teenage Dream. Also awesome (insert sarcasm).

4. I didn't come across a single girl that had married parents. Most were either divorced, fathers in jail, or multiple step family members.

5. Most of them are extremely insecure and just want to be loved.

6. Most of them have no idea what godly love looks like.

7. Most did NOT like Justin Bieber. I honestly expected a little more Bieber Fever.

8. Crushes and giggling was at it's peak!

9. Middle School with social media, facebook, and cell phones is a whole different ball game.

So those are my first observations on the surface. I love that I get to share with them my heart and my life over these next 16 weeks and hopefully be a role model to them. I hope they know that there is a God that loves them and that they don't have to strive in life to be wanted or just to be sexy. I hope these next few weeks will be about them finding their worth outside of boys or unrealistic cultural expectations.

What I'm Up To These Days

This weekend officially commenced the START of my LAST semester before I graduate with my Masters of Intercultural Studies! I am not entirely sure what kind of frame of mind I was in when I decided to pursue a dual masters degree, work a full-time stressful job, and then travel to San Francisco in order to take those classes in the first place. There has been a lot of losses and gains in my graduate school and professional journey. So needless to say, graduating May 19th will be quite the victory! And I am getting excited for what God has dreamed up for me in my next season of life.

Recently, I took on a third job. I now facilitate a sex prevention program for middle school girls called Avenues in 5 different Middle Schools in Riverside with the YWCA. It is a new mission field for me and praying that I don't take these little impressionable lives for granite this semester.

So between working on weekends, teaching middle schoolers not to have sex, consulting for my home business, researching, reading, writing, and socializing I am trying to seek the Lord in the process... I am busy! I welcome any and all prayers this semester!

What I'm Reading These Days

If you are looking for a good read, I would recommend "Church Planter: The Man, the Message, The Mission." Currently my small group is reading this together weekly taking a few chapters at a time. As our hearts have been captured to reach the nations, through church planting, we are beginning to resource ourselves. This book has stripped away the fantasy and sexy appeal of a church plant and served us with some reality and also beginning to question our own qualifications and some areas to improve. For me personally it has been a time of evaluation and really giving me some tangible things to examine in my own life as I move forward in life. If you are even thinking or playing around with the idea of planting a church, I would HIGHLY recommend this book for you!

FYI...This book was specifically written to men. Sometimes when we are discussing I tease that this convicting passage wasn't written for me cause I am a female...kidding of course.

On another note, I will also be writing a 30 t0 35 page capstone paper to seal the deal on my master degree. So pretty much from this moment forward, I will be reading lots and lots for research purposes. So here's to being a book nerd this semester (oh and graduating...have I mentioned that)?

Paleo Thoughts

So one of the things I did this year to kick-off the new year was to start the Paleo Diet. My friends Jess and Mike have changed their lifestyle to Paleo and have inspired a large community of us to see what it's all about.

For those readers who are unfamiliar with Paleo basically you do a 30-day strict detox to kick-off a new lifestyle of eating. So as of January the only things that I have put in my body have been protein, vegetables, fruit, and some nuts. Yep, that means NO sugar, carbs, or dairy.

What was I thinking? I mean that means no Starbucks for 30 days?! Well here are some of my thoughts....

1. I used to be incredibly disciplines in the area of food, but in the last few years, I have been less disciplines. So it is in hopes of learning the discipline again.

2. I really need to lose the poundage. I am currently the largest I have been in my life. BOOO.

3. And this way of living is supposed to be all natural and cuts out all preservatives and see how my body reacts.

So I have made it 7 days and these are my thoughts:

1. It feels good to be disciplined in the area of food again! I already am feeling good!

2. I have noticed more energy despite having no caffeine in my body. The first few days were rough with some bad caffeine headaches!

3. I am kind of getting tired of eating some of the same things, but that is because I have been too lazy to recipe and meal plan.

4. Fruit is my new dessert.

5. So far so good!

That is all for now, it sounded a little more exciting in my head!

11.28: On My Mind

Yesterday I received this quote from my good friend Kimberlee who is currently serving in the Pacific Rim. She said when she read it she immediately thought of me.

"God has a GLOBAL purpose for EVERY detour of your life." - John Piper

I haven't been able to get it out of my mind and is a truth and promise and a HOPE that I am clinging to today.

11.27: Weekend Lovin'

So the weekends these days are weird because I now work them. I can't tell a Saturday from a Wednesday. So I am having to rearrange how and when I do things. Saturday at Starskies with Becka still exist, but usually she is the one in the cafe and now I am the one behind the counter.

Tonight was just an enjoyable evening. I really enjoy doing things that are productive with my hands and that require work oddly enough. Tonight we went for an almost 4 mile run which to be frank with you was a little bit rough after all the holiday food. And then we put some finishing touches on our house that have been waiting for a holiday break. So we finally tore down all our boxes in our garage along with hanging the last few things on the wall and purchasing a few last items for the house including candles and a kitchen rug. Pretty much the only thing left that we need is a nice area rug for our living space. But we need some serious dough for that!

I am super excited about church tomorrow. It has been such a blessing to be in our new building and I am loving the sermon series too! I have been going with Natalie. She is a girl I am mentoring this semester and I honestly just love her more than anything. I love our intense conversation that are encouraging and theological at times. Not many people just love talking about theology so I am always super stoked when people engage me in theological conversation.

I also have on the agenda tomorrow to organize my desk! I have so much mail and bills and grown-up things that I need to take care of.

I also realized that I need to write a paper and do a test this week. I hate that I feel like I am finished with school for the semester and sadly I am not!

Signing off after a great day of work and quality time with my bestie!

11.26: Thanksgiving

Sorry that I have been MIA in my November Blog Fest for 4 days! I was traveling a little bit and had little to no internet access.

I had an interesting Thanksgiving this year. Thanks to my new employment, I had the joy of working from 11:30 to 6 on Thanksgiving which means there really wasn't time to do anything festive on the holiday. So I headed out to my cousins' house in Oak Park for a few days to hang out. I LOVE going to visit Erica and Nicks house because they end up spoiling me while I am there AND I just completely relax. I just love it. And she always makes me look beautiful by doing my hair!

This Thanksgiving morning as I was making the couple hour commute back down to Riverside I was reflecting on what I was truly thankful for. And honestly, I kept finding myself thankful for the cross and my salvation because it seems to keep everything in proper perspective for me. I would be lying if I said this semester was fun and than trusting God has been a fun or easy this semester. There have been many times when I want to feel sorry for myself, to despair, to freak out, or to want to go completely MIA, but trying to see my life in a bigger picture puts everything in perspective and make me woman-up.

So this season, I am just so thankful for Christ in my life. I would be a hot mess without Him. I know this is a super cliche but it's true.

I hope everyone has been enjoying the holiday season!!

11.22: Jehovah Jireh

Today I received an incredibly generous check in the mail from the first student that I met at CBU. She baked banana nut bread for me before I even arrived knowing that I would know no one and that it would be an awesome welcoming gift. And she was right. She has always been generous and she has always been a good friend.

As all of you know, I have been pretty much unemployed since August and finances have been really scarce. In fact, I could be really honest and say that the past few weeks I have been struggling a lot more mentally with my financial state. This month has taken a huge financial hit because I haven't been able to work my home business because of training for Starbucks. And let's just be honest, my $10 an hour job at Starbucks part-time isn't cutting the bills. AND I am not sure how my unemployment checks are being affected by my new income.

So this month, I have honestly been stressed financially knowing that some bills are being completely ignored and not really sure even what my monthly income is these days.

But I will say this, God has provided in ways that is always a sweet reminder of his character as Jehovah Jireh. Yesterday, someone bought my lunch and today I received a generous check. And the fact that I have made it this far with where my finances are is a miracle. It's the small ways that remind me that God is bigger than my lack of full-time income, my lack of trust most days these days, and my own needs.

So thankful for the steadfast character of my God despite my life circumstances.

11.21: Fasting

As alluded to in a previous post, I picked up a book of fasting. Have you ever had a spiritual discipline that you just didn't understand Biblically? That you know there is value but you haven't bought in enough to participate? That is what fasting is for me. Fasting to me is one of the most vague and bizarre of the disciplines, from what others have experienced, yet one of the most powerful.

So I picked up this book so that I could have a Biblical framework to answer the why and then fast with pure motives and intent.

In the introduction, Piper starts with "the birthplace for Christian fasting is homesickness for God." We fast because we long to be at home with God it's our own hunger for God.

"The greatest enemy for the hunger of God is not poison but the apple pie. The greatest adversary for the love of God is not his enemies but his gifts. And the most deadly appetites are not for the poison of evil, but for the simple pleasures of the earth. For when these replace an appetite for God himself, the idolatry is scarcely recognizable, and almost incurable."

The things that take away our desire for God are the gifts of God. "They are your basic meat and potatoes and coffee and gardening and reading and decorating and traveling and investing and TV-watching and Internet-surfing and shopping and exercising and collecting and talking. And all of them can become DEADLY substitutes for God."

He makes the point that fasting isn't really only specific to food, but anything that substitutes our desire for God.

He then asked the question how does fasting keep us from turning gifts into gods?

He then reminds us of the story in the Old Testament where God asks Abraham to sacrifice Issac on the altar. The age-old question is why would God ask this of Abraham. Piper points out that there are times in our lives that we need to prove our preference and love for God through literal and outward acts of obedience. To prove to ourselves that we really do choose God. Piper states, "God wills to know the actual, lived-out reality of our preference for him over all things. And he wills that we have the testimony of our own authenticity through acts of actual preference of God over his gifts.

I think that this book will be a healthy study for me and I am excited to dispel the mystery of fasting. I am excited about gaining knowledge of this new discipline and hopefully grow in the practice of it in my life.

11.19: Refresh

I found a new drink at Starbucks that I like it's a Passion Tea Lemonade. I realize that this is old news to most people, but it is SO VERY REFRESHING.

Today was also incredibly refreshing such as a PTL.

I had the opportunity to go for a run with one of my new partners at Starbucks. She is enlisting in the military is trying to build up her endurance for running. So we went for a run. I would like to consider my new employment at the Bucks as a new place to bring the gospel. So this was hopefully the beginning of building a friendship that will hopefully lead to sharing the gospel.

I also had the opportunity to meet with one of my students that I went to India with this summer. We talked about life, theology, the church, and friendship. It was such a blessing to share conversation with him and just get to speak some truth into his life.

AND I had small group tonight with people that I genuinely love. It was probably one of the most difficult conversations that our group has shared together as we plan for our futures of moving overseas. It was a talk about where the rubber meets the road and if we are going to change things up in our lives. We are starting to have a lot of specific church planting conversation. I walked away tonight excited about a vision and challenged to get my butt in gear.

Today was refreshing. New friendships, mentorship, and getting my butt kicked was so refreshing and has given me a little perspective after this somewhat crappy week. God is good.

11.18: Hunger for God

This is the post I would've written yesterday, but was too tired to write and had a 3:45 AM rise.

Last night I opened a new book called "Hunger for God" by John Piper.

It is a book on the spiritual discipline of fasting.

It was so convicting it made my stomach hurt and I only made it through like 6 pages.

Good stuff.

I hope to blog about it more later and why I chose this book to read.

11.16: Blah

Tonight I am just blah. Busy day at the bucks. I had a CBU student come in to the Bucks today and I told him I was working here and he didn't believe me. I had to tell him about 16 times.

I work with high school graduates that my roommate had as students. This time last year, I had my dream job and now I work at Starbucks and another job that is hard to explain.

Days like today I feel like I am about 6 steps back from where I once was.

I miss my CBU community. And I guess I am surprised at how quickly most of them forgot me.

BIG SIGH.

Thankful for new days.

I open tomorrow for the Bucks at 4:30 am. Best I get my butt in bed.

11.15: Oops

So I didn't realize that I missed 4 days of the November Blog Fest! I am so sorry. I guess it's kind of indicative of how I have felt about this attempt "to return." So far every goal that I have set for myself has been engulfed by busyness. I guess that is the story of my life and I can't keep using busyness as an excuse to not make time for the things that are important like running and spending time in the word.

Life always seems like one big game of failing and trying and hoping to succeed.

On another note...

1. My presentation weekend was a complete success. I was so proud to be a part of Cohort 9. We presented our ethnographic research to about 100ish people. One of the capstone's of ethnographic research is to share the voice of the one's who have no voice. It honestly was a joy to share the voice of the Bedouin desert nomads of Oman. The participants who had no voice now had a voice for those in attendance.
2. I was thankful that Becka was there. There is a culture on the Golden Gate campus for this particular presentation so the campus was buzzing of our presentation. Nobody here in So Cal knows anything about this yearly presentation of cohorts. So it was nice to have someone down south that was present for the presentation.
3. After the presentation we went to Pier 39 for seafood and drinks and then made the trek home and arrived at 3:00 am.

11.11: Sisters

Many of you know that I am the youngest of three sisters. Tonight I had the rare opportunity to hear from both of them on Skype. You know how in some families that because you are sisters you are exactly alike both in personality and looks. Well scratch this idea because this is not how me and my sisters are.

Shannon is EXACTLY three years older than me because I was born on her third birthday (and now we are not twins, just to clear that up). My memories of her growing-up are of us fighting. My particularly favorite fighting story of ours involves a new drivers license, the Christmas holidays, the mall, and twisting each other's boobs. It's pretty much a laugh off your chair kind of story. We were the typical oldest sister vs. younger sister growing up. So we left each other alone.

Amber and I are 1 year and 17 days apart. Amber is the peacemaker. She is your typical middle sister. She was always trying to get Shannon and I to get along which generally lead to us becoming annoyed and mad at her. Amber is good at math. She used to help me with my math homework in high school and I remember getting impatient with her when she just wouldn't give me the answer. We were both cheerleaders together, worked on yearbook staff, attended the same college, graduated from college in the same ceremony, and then we both moved overseas at the same time. I moved to India she moved to South Korea (my poor mother). Our lives somehow have always mirrored each others. Even now, she is in Georgia and I am in California. East coast vs. West coast. Both out-of-state (again my poor mother).

I love both of these ladies so much but on two completely different levels because well let's just be honest we are all so different their has to be love on different levels. One thing I hate most about my life is that both of these ladies are in my life in a very minimal way. Texas and Georgia are worlds away from California. However, when we do actually spend time together I find myself entirely in love with them both. The three of us together is dangerous and one quirky threesome. But they are my sisters and I love them.

They are my favorite ladies to watch musicals (white christmas, 7 brides for 7 brothers) with, my favorite ladies to laugh with, my favorite ladies to spend the holidays with and my favorite ladies to just be myself with.

Not sure why I decided to blog about them tonight, but I miss them both terribly. I still hope one day that all of us will live on the same street raising our crazy but incredibly beautiful children together. I hope our kids be awesome cousins to one another.

Love you ladies and miss you.

11.10: The Changing Face of Oman

This much anticipated weekend is finally here! This Saturday at 10:00 am, my cohort will be presenting our qualitative research on the Bedouin people group from our five weeks of living in Oman. This presentation is the single most important thing in my academic career that my cohort will have produced together. Needless to say, we have been working hard to put together a presentation that gives a voice to the people of Oman that we were privileged enough to interview and get to know this summer.

Our presentation will begin at 10:00 AM. We will have an interactive display for our guests to enjoy and it will be followed by a reception. We were able to find a Middle Eastern woman in a farmer's market who will be providing our cultural delicacy's for the reception.

Please keep me and my cohort in your prayers as we work hard to finalize the details for the presentation and that is something that accurately portrays our Bedouin participants.

On a side note, the President of Union University, David Dockery, will be flying into for the presentation. And it will be also attended by many more of our Union professors who will be flying in for the occasion along with other Golden Gate faculty.

It should be a great event and I am excited to see what we have accomplished as a cohort!

11.9: Starbucks Initiation

Sorry for skipping out on the November Blog Fest for 2 days. The past few days have been filled with completing papers, class, and working at Starbucks.

Starbucks seems to be the main thing in my mind these days... Every new job has a day where you feel like it was your day of initiation. Today was that for me. Here are my debrief thoughts for the day.

1. I went to my first regional meeting. It was a holiday meeting. It was filled with red aprons, goals, and Christmas cheer. Yep. Gearing up for selling the deliciousness that is the Christmas blend.
2. I found out one of my co-workers (who is 18) was my roommate Becka's student. It was a funny yet bonding connection for Derek and I.
3. I get to work with David at my store. David was my student co-leader for my trip to East Asia two summers ago. It's kind of fun being his boss again and to get to work alongside of him. I love that kid.
4. The other Baristas were making fun of me today. Which they then informed me that they only tease the people they like. #coworkerwin
5. I returned to my store after a the meeting to an understaffed shift. So I definitely got THROWN IN THE DEEP IN. I pretty much owned the drinks and asked lots and lots of questions.
6. I worked 45 minutes later than I was supposed to without my ten minute break. I feel like this earned me some stripes today.
7. I went in for coffee tonight after I babysat little E and they heard that I got thrown and I seemed it was talked about in a respectful way. They even gave me my coffee on the house.

I feel like I won some respect from my co-workers today! It is a good feeling. I am really thankful that God has placed so many new people in my area of influence- especially a lot of young college age students! College student ministry continues on!!

11.6 Saturday at Starskies and More with Becks

I started a blog post earlier today and then realized that I didn't have enough time to articulate what I really wanted too. So here I am writing at almost 2 am. But really it's only 1am because of the time change. :)

Today was actually really fun. Sometimes I am convinced that my Saturdays are totally lame because I always wake up knowing I will be spending the majority of my day doing homework and all my plans revolve around this. However, today turned out to be a rather lovely day. I really enjoyed quality time with my bestie becka becuase we haven't really had anytime lately to connect. So today was really fun. We wrote our papers together at Starbucks and then we hopped over to her parents' house for dinner. I love sitting around a dinner table with family. It makes me feel normal when I eat a home cooked meal with the Lohmans. They are like my adopted family in Riverside. They feed me and invite me to holidays. It's super great. Then we went on a mall excursion to get some necessary items (cheetah VS boyfriend cut sweat pants) and then decided to also indulge ourselves in some Red Velvet cheesecake from the Cheesecake factory. So we got it to go and ate it with a freshly brewed cup of coffee to kick start our second writing sesh.

Today I am thankful for Becka. She is my best friend and there are very few people in this world that I feel as loved, accepted, and myself around. She is my favorite person to spend my Saturdays with and to be experiencing this season in life with. People tease all the time (and quite frankly we tease ourselves) that we are spousal. It's pretty much a true accusation. But I am so thankful to have someone to share life with on such a deep and spiritual level. So tonight I am just thankful for my witty, ridiculous, ghetto, intelligent, and oh so wonderful Bestie Becka.

11.5: Missing Texas

During my ten minute break today, I checked my phone to see a voicemail and text message from my mom saying that my dad was having an emergency surgery to take out his appendix. He is out of surgery and supposedly it did rupture, but his intestines became the gatekeeper and kept the poison from spreading to his body. God is good! The surgery was successful and they will be keeping him to Sunday.

It's nights like tonight that I wish that I could've gotten off work and headed to the hospital to be there with my mom and to kiss my daddy on the cheek. I just got off the phone with my mom and she is spending the night at the hospital tonight and all weekend. I would give my appendix to right now to spend the weekend with my parents.

It is nights like tonight that I am CLEARLY reminded of my Texas roots and how I wish I didn't have to observe my family from a distance. I have also made the decision not to come home this holiday season. So tonight, I am just a little homesick missing the parentals and a little bit of Texas.

11.4: 9 Days and Counting

In 9 short days, I will be finished with attending ALL four of my graduate classes for the fall semester! Tonight I had my last class for "Foundations of Educational Leadership" that ended with a round table discussion at Starbucks about culture! Yippee. Skippee. Last weekend, we ended my "Creative Expression Across Cultures" with a day in the city visiting 2 museums. This coming Monday is my last class for "Faith and Worship in the Faith Community". Which will be shortly followed by... my last drive to SF to do our final presentation on the Bedouin!!!

So in 9 short days, I will be one step closer to finishing out the semester! If only all my assignments would be complete...I unfortunately still have several papers to right for the rest of the semester.

There is nothing greater than the feeling I had tonight when I left class knowing that I won't have to meet again! Another seminary class: CHECK!

PS. Today I made my very first Late, Mocha, and Americano coffee.

11.3: Learning Curve

So I have officially taken on two different jobs in about a six week period of time. They are both in a job field that I have NO real experience in. Therefore, my learning curve is HUGE. The only thing that I have going for me are my people skills. I have never been so thankful not to be social awkward. It's really paying off these days.

For example, earlier today I was learning the art of making the perfect cup of coffee and then came home to learning how to do online marketing. And then I thought to myself, "What the heck was I thinking?!"

So I have recently immersed myself in two different corporate worlds learning new lingo, systems, philosophy's, and trying to gain a vision for both. And the funniest thing about this scenario is that I am leading people in both jobs.

I have lots of Starbucks partners who's eyes widen when they find out I came in as their Lead Shift Supervisor. I still have yet to determine if this is them feeling sorry for my learning curve OR a little annoyed that they weren't promoted to shift lead.

And then with Melaleuca, because of my success and growing my team, I am currently training and leading several individuals! YIKES. Its like the blind leading the blind.

Despite this huge learning curve, I am LOVING all the new experiences in non-ministry jobs. I have a whole other blog post about my philosophy of work that I will save for another day. But I am excited to get some new skills and tools under my belt and to learn!

So kind of a random post today, but kind of all I was thinking about today!

11.2: Starbucks

Anyone that knows me knows of my addiction/obsession with Starbucks. It is a known fact that I spend more on Starbucks than I probably should. However, as a single female that doesn't "get any" and doesn't really spend my money on shopping or alcohol- I feel that it is my one pleasure and indulgence. I realize the logic in this is flawed, but it's my logic, and I am chained to it because it's all just so delicious.

My love for Starbucks grew in college. There were two main catalyst: a crush and being a student. Yep. It's true. My love for coffee slowly formed from drinking caramel fraps and has evolved from there. My love for coffee shops started with a guy that I had a huge crush on that also equally loved Starbucks and would frequent the same Starbucks OFTEN. I would "conveniently" study there in hopes to run into him. Lets just say back in the day, I used to have a Starbucks "fling". It was during this time of spending hours studying both my books and the boy that I began to form a community of people. I had great friendships that were made and developed overtime so that Starbucks did become my community and a place of hopeful romance. I remember being suprised at how many ministry opportunities I had because I grew a community of friends young and old at this place. My love for Starbucks and coffee was solidified in college

Over the years, my love for Starbucks has grown. It became a little bit of "home" in many of the countries that I have traveled to and even have a country mug to prove it. Starbucks in different countries have special spiritual meaning to me. My favorite Starbucks is in Chiang Mai. It is 3 stories and I was there the opening night on New Years 2006. In the time that I lost my passport and got stranded in Thailand, Starbucks is where I spent many hours journaling and praying about God's plan for my life when I returned. Since then, journaling in Starbucks is one of my favorite past times and a way that I connect with the Father.

All this to say, Starbucks is more than just a store to me. In fact, Becka and I consecrate most of our grad school Saturdays and call it "Saturday at Starskies." I have probabaly become smarter in-between those walls because of all the intellectual genius work that I have produced while sipping coffee. I also have awesome Christmas roomies with the ladies of 611 of getting our holiday drinks on our way to cut down our Christmas tree. That place is just full of memories of sharing life with friends.

So now I am an actual "Starbucks Partner". Yep. It's official. I am a Shift Lead Supervisor as of last week. I am only hired to work part-time on weekends, but here are the benefits....

1. I get BENEFITS. Thank the Lord. My new consulting job doesn't have any so it's a nice compliment.

2. It actually keeps me connected to other people. I love the convenience of working from home, but who am I kidding, I need to be around people. It keeps me connected to my Riverside community.

3. THE FREE COFFEE. I already confessed most of my "fun" money goes to this place- so think of all the money I will save?!

4. It's only like 3 minutes away from my new house.

5. I get to have supervisory experience.

6. It's an international company...maybe it can be a platform overseas one day.

So far I like the partners I work with and the cool perks that come with it. They are out of aprons right now, but once I get my apron, I will post pictures of me as a Starbucks Barrista!

Anyone want to guess what my drink of choice is?

11.1: Month of Return

It's 11:34 pm and I have a little less than 30 minutes to make my first November post. I have been thinking about blogging and what to blog about all day. I have a lot of high hopes for this month. I am calling this a month of return because I need to return to things that make me feel like Alicia and things that are just GOOD for me even if I hate them in the moment.

I have been telling my roommate Becka for over a year now that I used to be a different person and that I don't necessarily like who I am all the time these days. And then one day, when I was recently sharing this again she called me out. She said you've been saying this long enough that maybe this is who you really are. Ouch. As hard as that was to hear, it is the truth.

So this is a month of an attempt at returning. I am not naive enough to think that I will be the same, but I do hope to bring back some redemptive things about myself that make me tick. So here are some things I am trying to be consistent with this month. And by consistent I mean daily.

1. I want to go running every day. Today I ran 2 miles. I loved running, but I am OUT OF SHAPE which means that I am not so much on the "enjoying running" side of the spectrum. So I am hoping to start small at 2 miles every day and go from there. And I am training for another half-marathon. So at this point, I need to start running consistently.

2. I want to spend adequate time STUDYING Scripture and spending time with the Lord DAILY. I have an Inductive Study on the Book of 1 Samuel that I picked up today. So I will start the first day tomorrow.

3. I need to trim down a bit. The reasons for this could be a completely separate blog post. But my plan is that you will see LESS of me in November. :)

My spiritual and physical health are my focus this month. These are both linked to discipline. I feel like these are the baby steps to starting to deal with a lot of bigger steps in the near future. So this is where I am at the first part of this month and where I hope to go. Feel free to ask me how it's going. :) Oh and your prayers would be much appreciated.

November Blogging

November is HERE. CRAZY.

I have decided to take on a challenge from my friend Dave from this blog post.

So I am taking on the challenge to write a post every day this month. So it will be a month of blog, blog, blogging.

Things to take place this month:

1. My big professional presentation of the Bedouin People

2. My training and new part-time employment with Starbucks as a shift lead supervisor/barrista.

3. Thanksgiving

4. Training for my half.

5. Personal goals for this month (running and dieting)

Here's to hearing me write a lot this month.

Is Your Home Safe?

A Wake-Up Story from Healthy Child Healthy World on Vimeo.

For More information click: http://www.betterhealthinfo.net/start-now

Going Green Employment

As promised, I am going to tell you a little bit more about my new employment. I technically am self-employed and I do consultant work for a pharmaceutical company called Melaleuca. I have decided to build my own home business through doing referral marketing to find customers AND also provide opportunity for others to build their own business with me. I am kind of like a job-fairy these days. It is really awesome to help people find income in these difficult economical times. The best part is most of the people I am able to help is stay-at-home moms who would like to bring in supplemental income for their families. So this is what I do these days.

Melaleuca is a company that has been around for the past 25 years and has won several awards with the BBB. and they specialize in all green/natural products. In fact, melaleuca is the scientific term for tea tree oil. One of their tag lines is "We went green before it was popular to go green."

As most of you know, I am the least green person you know. I don't even really enjoy recycling. Yes, I just admitted that. I've kind of thought it was just another fad for people to make money and a way for people that are organic to just have an excuse to be high maintenance. However, over the past year, I have slowly been exposed to how much chemicals are in things such as cleaning products, detergent, etc... and THAT it is harming our bodies and can be linked to cancer and autism (yes, I am a little slow!). I have also had several family members and friends who have been emphasizing the importance of organic foods. I have also seen the huge physical benefits of friends who have gone organic or gone green. They are losing weight and gaining necessary energy. Maybe there really is something to this whole going green thing? So I am going to do some green soul searching and see what I find out.

All this to say, I am going to slowly start transitioning myself into going green both with what I put in my body and what I surround myself with.

Step #1- I just purchased all GREEN cleaning products. I am moving into a new house this weekend and I am starting it out CHEMICAL/TOXIC free!

Step #2- I also purchased some deodorant, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, body wash, etc... that is all green.

Step #3- I am going to start doing research on how to start eating all organic foods and start rotating the other stuff out. I am thankful that I am moving closer to Trader Joes AND the Farmers Market in downtown Riverside!

This is where I am at now. It is just the beginning of a journey. So as I begin to learn and become green I will share my thoughts of the process. I am also going to use this blog as a forum for going green and posting interesting articles or research that I find.

October and Life Update

October is upon us all! At the beginning of the semester, I knew this would just be a crazy busy month! It is proving to be true! Here's my crazy month in bullet-points.

• I am moving on October 23rd about 5 miles down the road from an apartment to a house! The thing I am most excited about is the fact that I will finally have my own bedroom!
• ALL of my assignments for ALL 4 of my graduate classes are pretty much do in the month of October including one VERY Large 100 pages paper my cohort is writing together AND about 3 12 page papers, along with various other treashures of reading and writing assignments.

Ok I guess that is all. In my mind it is sooo much more!

In other news, I have a new job. I actually started a tele-commute position from home that makes great money! So I now work from home with hours that are a little more than part-time but not full-time. Working from home is a little bit of a stretch for me because I love being around people BUT making my own schedule is awesome and makes up for it! Soon I will write a post specifically about this...so stay tuned.

I feel like there has been a TON of change. A new house, a new job, and a new community. I love how quickly life can change and I love love love even more to see God's faithfulness through it all!!

Shout out to BZuni

This post is dedicated to my dear friend Brian. I recently went to a large social event and saw a bunch of people I had not seen in a long time. So when I saw Brian at this shin-dig, before I could even say "how are you?", he BLURTED out "I read your blog." It threw me off-guard, but it then made me laugh and I appreciated it. I felt like he knew so much more of how and what I had been up to, so it really did change the mode of our conversation.

I love social media. So here's to Brian and all you other people who stop periodically and care about know about my life. Feel free to leave a comment and let me know who you are!

10 random things

1. I am completely blessed by the body of Christ in my life. I am blessed by how many people have emailed, called, facebooked, and PRAYED for me through a seemingly difficult transition in my life. I have felt prayer in such a powerful way this month that it makes me thankful for the difficulty.

2. I have about 3-4 random different jobs that are potential possibilities for employment and none of them require flipping a burger or minimum wage! Thank the Lord. I might have to actually choose which job to take.

3. I have the awesome opportunity to mentor a college student who is starting her Senior year. I feel so honored to share life with her this semester. She is so fun and has an awesome heart for the Lord AND somehow I am funnier, more sarcastic and definitely more witty when she is around. Oh and the icing on the cake is she also loves India.

4. I babysat a 2 month old baby today. He basically stole my heart and he fell asleep on me! It was the best little bit of TLC and cuddle time a single like me needed. I really really want one of my own sometime soon or I just hope that God has children as part of his future plans for me. I am just working on the husband part. Or should I say, the Lord is working on the husband part.

5. I randomly took a test today at a temp agency that proved I can do basic arithmetic, spell, edit, and follow directions. Who knew? Supposedly I scored really high. Which is good because if not I would be embarrassed as a graduate level student.

6. I also learned I am a huge fan of temp agencies, specifically Riverside Personnel Services Inc. If you live in the Inland Empire, can do office work, and need a job, I would DEFINITELY recommend you try them out.

7. I have lost about 5 lbs in the last 2 weeks and already feeling so much better about myself.

8. Despite the forced new situation, I find beauty in God's promises, His goodness, and His all around awesomeness, It has kept me more joyful and happy than I have been all year. Funny how God works sometimes.

9. The Pumpkin Spice Late is rockin' my world this week.

10. I secretly like that it got to be 102 degrees in Riverside today.

Beach

I went to the beach today with my roomies. Not many things on this earth that make me more happy than the beach and my two besties.

A Little Sunshine

After two recent depressing posts, I thought it would be appropriate for me to post how great and awesome my day was today!

1. I interfaced with lots of people today starting with my awesome notorious cohort this morning at 8 am! It was nice to have something to wake up for this morning.
2. I got an interview through a temp agency on Tuesday at 9:00 AM.
3. I had lunch with my friend Kim who is two weeks from delivering her second baby!
4. I had FREE Chick-fil-a for lunch with Kim because of coupons.
5. I stopped by my favorite little indian market/store in Riverside. I took it upon myself to try to network to find a job in the Indian community.
6. I got to share the gospel today and have lots of spiritual conversations with the sweet Indian couple.
7. In the process of the conversation, the Indian man asked me if I was experiencing financial hardship, he then gave me $40 in cash from his register. I cried.
8. My sweet friend Natalie came over and we laid by the pool for a little bit. We went to India this summer together and I am going to be mentoring her this semester!! I am somehow funnier and wittier when she is around.
9. I had a club status dance party with my roommate Becka and Natalie to end the evening...there were great tunes, heals, and free-flowing hair. Our apartment might never been the same.

Today was sunshine in the midst of a really stormy and rainy week. God gave me opportunity to share His truth, to invest in a girl i love dearly, and to just have some normal interaction with people!!

I was also completely blessed by the Indian man who gave me $40 for a tank of gas. He's not even in the family of God and he extended to me such kindness. This man doesn't really have any more money than I do. He was so generous and I feel so undeserving. I was just plain blessed by the goodness of God today!!

When It Rains it Pours

This week was the first week where I have actually had the time to deal with my unemployment and lack of cash flow. These are all the things that happened this week to make this week a week that I never want to come back to again.

1. My car got towed and it cost me $275 to get it back.
2. I found out I might not qualify for unemployment after all because I am a graduate student. For the past 3 weeks thought I was collecting and getting some cash flow. I still don't know if get it UI.
3. I realized that even if I get a job at Starbucks at $8 an hour and work full-time I won't make enough money to pay my bills monthly.
4. I got a traffic ticket in the mail.
5. I have less than $200 in my bank account and I have all my bills due in the next two weeks.
6. I have had NO leads on a job WHATSOEVER. I have even sent out tons of Nanny interest and NOTHING.
7. I am becoming socially awkward as I have no social interaction all day long with the actual real world.
8. I officially can't afford Starbucks Coffee.

So that was my week. Yes. Please call me Debbie Downer, I will own up to it. But this week was seriously such a bad week filled with close to mental break-downs and lots of tears. I am not sure what God is doing or what he is teaching me.... this could be a long semester.

The Break-Up

I have somewhat recent news to the world of blogging- I AM UNEMPLOYED. The best metaphor that describes how I feel could be equated with a break-up. The situation of why my employer and I broke-up is complicated at best, as are most relationships. My first reaction was complete peace and acceptance. As a follower of Christ, I know that all things are purposeful- He gives and takes away. But soon followed anger, confusion, and discontentment with the way things ended. All of my love, energy, and passion was in this relationship and community for the past three years that now it's gone. I find myself quite displaced and struggle to understand my own identity in my new context outside of this relationship. After all, it is this relationship that brought me to California. I have left friends and family and everything to serve and to love this employer. All this to say, I am just plain heartbroken and my dream job is gone.

Despite my broken heart, I have hope. I have hope because I serve a God that is bigger than unemployment, failures, and monetary needs. As with all major changes in life, it means that God is at work and HE IS ON THE MOVE IN MY LIFE. Now I get to trust.

Day 3 of 30 of Ramadan- Join me in Praying for Muslims

30-Days of Prayer for the Muslim World
Ramadan 2010 / 1431: August 11 - September 09

The Call of the Muezzin - Friday Prayer Focus For Friday 13 August, Ramadan 2010. "Loving Muslims Through Prayer". Each day across the entire Islamic world, the 'muezzin' call the men to prayer five times per day over a loudspeaker located on a minaret (tower) attached to the mosque: at dawn (fajr), noon (dhuhr), in the afternoon (asr), at sunset (maghrib) and nightfall (isha’a). On Fridays (like today) all male Muslims are supposed to attend the noontime prayers which are usually accompanied by a sermon. Sometimes recordings are used but most people prefer a live voice. In Western and non-Islamic countries muezzin often cannot make the call to prayer except on the radio or in the courtyards of local mosques because of laws restricting loud and intrusive sounds. Their own honour and prestige are temptations, as with any public figures like pastors and politicians.

Prayer Starters:
Pray for the muezzin in your own country and around the world today to have a personal encounter with the living God, through Jesus Christ.
Pray that in the midst of many 'voices' and messages, Muslims will hear the voice of God through the working of the Holy Spirit.
Sometimes muezzin become very centred on their role in society. As with any public figures like pastors and politicians some muezzin are tempted to place their own honour and prestige very high on their list of priorities. Pray that all muezzin would be brought to humility before God and truly confounded by His majesty in order that they may truly say "God is great."
Complete article, video and comments: http://www.30-days.net/muslims/featured/the-call-of-the-muezzin/

Flattered or Annoyed?

I am sitting in the San Antonio airport after my 3:00 AM wake-up call this morning waiting to board my plane to Phoenix and something happened this morning that ALWAYS happens. No matter what I am wearing or how my hair is fixed, people always assume that I am a college student barely over twenty. Today is the third time in the past week that people have asked me what college I go to and what I am studying. I realize that I should be flattered and thankful for the fact that I apparently have awesome genes for aging. But every time, I find myself annoyed wishing I looked more distinguished and a "woman of maturity" in my late twenties. Fat chance that is going to happen. I mean what are the perks of being in your late twenties if people always assume you are still a free spirited college student with little real life experience? Now that I recently crossed over into my late-twenties, I feel the need to embrace it fully and benefit from some of the awesome perks worthy of the faces of shock made at me when they find out I am actually "old".

Maybe I should start wearing cardigans and pearls instead of my boyfriend cut VS sweatpants.

Just a little 5AM rant for your enjoyment.
PS. I think my unemployment is allowing me the actual time to write all the posts that I write in my head that never usually would make it on the blog. Yay. ME. and. Lucky. YOU.

Introducing Sultan Qaboos

I bought a purple car in 2007 as most of you know. I also have a love for naming things, something most of you might not know. However, in my two years of owning this little pride and joy, I have been rather unsuccessful in naming him. The crux of the issue really is that he is purple yet very masculine, which is quite the juxtaposition. So I have struggled to find a name that encompasses both of these characteristics of my car. Several people have tried including two different Rebecca's (although different spellings) and Trent. And we have all been unsuccessful. Yes, there has been some creative stabs at naming him, but nothing I knew would stick.

One of the funnest things that came from my summer in Oman was the naming of my car. Only the eleven members of my Notorious Nine cohort will truly appreciate the name, but I don't care. A little history lesson, there are only two Sultans in the world. One in Oman and the other in Brunei. Everyone in Oman LOVES Sultan Qaboos because he basically brought civilization, education, healthcare, jobs, and an easier life to Oman. I mean who wouldn't love the Sultan?

After Trent's brilliant suggestion and three years of namelessness, I have decided to name my car "Sultan Qaboos". Because the Sultan is royalty (hence the purple) and Qaboos (pronounced caboose) is a super fun pronunciation and I might also add... an incredibly masculine name (humor me).

Secondly, if I could be any Disney princess I would want to be Jasmine because let's just be honest, she is a middle eastern hottie of pure exoticness. And who doesn't want to be that? So all of my time in Oman this summer I kept teasing my cohort how I wanted to have a "fling" with the Sultan (after all he is still single and in Oman it is appropriate to have multiple wives). Then I could become the REAL Jasmine and have my own palace. Sadly and shockingly enough, we never met. But now that I named my car, I guess I get to take a ride with the Sultan whenever I want.

In the near future you might find me saying... "Lets take the Sultan", or "put it in the Qaboos", or "shake your Qaboos", or other such awesome phrases. I love that the Sultan finally has a name. It makes the ride oh so much better.

SAME SAME BUT DIFFERENT.

Damage Control

A very common phrase in the apartment of 611 over the past couple of years has been "damage control." I have received this phrase via text messaging or phone calls from either roommate, Becka or Sarah, which means that whatever plans I had for the night are rescheduled and I am theirs for the night. Breakups, bad news, job losses, last day of jobs, or any type of emotional stress usually results in in the need for damage control. Some of the most common damage control outings involve Target, Chick-fil-a, and Old Navy. Exreme measures and free schedules do indeed call for the beach. Over the years, we have gotten pretty good at determing what each other needs.

On Monday, I resigned from my position at CBU. Despite the fact that I had a peace about it, I was still a complete wreck. I came home to my roommates who had already collaborated the damage control for the evening. At 7 pm, I come home to them telling me to grab a sweat shirt and that we were headed on a road trip. I of course know that we are headed to the beach and I am relieved to know that we are getting out of Riverside. I love the beach more than most things, but I especially love the beach at night. We of course jammed to all our favorite hip hop music cd's we always make for road trips and headed to Laguna Beach. So we put in our names at BJ's and enjoyed all that BJ's has to offer including their amazing Spinach Artichoke Dip and Pizookie's. We were thankful for the dark and handsome waiter but even more thankful for the ridiculous females next to us that were such ridiculous "California Gurls" as snoop dog and perry would say. After filling our bellies, we traveled across the street to the beach where we plopped our bottoms in the sand and talked. The damage control was initially for me, but God is doing big things in all of our lives and I think we all needed the beach. It was just refreshing to be with sisters that loved me unconditionally and know my heart and where I am. The evening ended with us sharing our hearts through prayer requests and then getting the privilege to actually pray for each other right there on the beach for the next half hour or more. We walked away blessed and refreshed. Some of my best memories in Southern California are the ones praying in crazy places of nature with these ladies.

And yes we were all three wearing the Boyfriend Cut Sweat pants.....

I'm Back

As you can see, I have been quite abscent from the world of blogging due to my travels to India and Oman this summer. I honestly have a lot of stuff floating around in my head that I am looking forward to blogging about. The next several posts will probably not be in chronological order, so you will just have to deal.